My Voice, My Thoughts

Time to speak out

Toto, we’re not in Kansas anymore… April 10, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — kuya201 @ 11:15 pm

We’re all familiar with the movie the “Wizard of Oz”- It’s a tale of a young girl who is upset with things at home, nothing is going right. She runs away from home and speaks with professor Marvel. On her way back a tornado, takes the house up into the cyclone, and drops it on the Wicked Witch of the East in the Munchkin land of Oz. Sounds like fun, eh? Travel into your dreams, “over the rainbow” might I add. Today was so humid out, it was actually miserable at work. I work at a flower shop, connected to a green house, so you can imagine the heat penetrating through the store. While on the way home, the weather had turn quite dark. Mother Nature didn’t know what to do with it’s self, after all, two days ago we were all in our winter jackets, and today humid as all hell, and the rain was like a water faucet, on and off, on and off. After getting home, I turned on the weather. Many tornado’s had touched down south. I tried not to think about it, because I can recall when I was younger, a tornado threat . We were all in the basement and I don’t know how many prayers I said, I turned into a basket case. I had those same feelings tonight. I went to my friend Erin’s house, and brought along with me my seasons of Roseanne. I knew there was an episode called, “Toto, were not in Kansas, anymore” so we watched it, in honor of what was going on outside. In it, Roseanne uses lots of humor to cope with the fact of something as deadly and scary as a twister. I realized that I do the same thing. I am scared of death, and a tornado just scares me, almost to the point of being hysterical. Why do I fear death? Am I not a Christian, that believes in the Resurrection of the dead, the life of the world to come, the saving promise of the Easter Sacrifice? Why is it that I fear death so. Is it separation? Is it the fact that I can no longer control my environment. I believe that is why I am always trying to keep on God’s good turf. I don’t want to mess something up, and disappoint him, for who knows, I could be killed in a car accident tomorrow, am I clean in the eyes of God?

There was a reading this weekend at church which is one of my favorite readings.

John 11: 25- 26 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and whoever lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?”

Everyone faces their fears differently, some just brush them under the rug, and try not to think about them, some confront them head on. Me, I tackle them with humor, I try to make jokes and brush it off, but it sits and eats at me on the inside, I think that is why I like the television series, Roseanne. She has many problems with life, like all, and you know what she does? She plays them off, it’s reality. Shit happens, we can’t change it, sometimes you just have to laugh about it, even when it makes you want to cry. What are your fears? What makes you coil back, and linger in dispare?

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